038B Side Slop: John Wick: Chapter 3
What makes a great video game movie? Heap on the style and and delete the video game portion! Find out why that statement is relevant to John Wick 3 as Jon and Special Guest Jason have their soft parts attacked by John Wick Chapter 3 - Parabellum!
036B Side Slop: Hard Hunted
Kane is back.. in time apparently. As a much younger, more handsome but significantly less interesting version of himself and he is here to finish what he started! And by finish I mean start a whole new plan with his whole new face! This time Jon and Chris dodge errant missiles ejected from the action epic Hard Hunted!
Savage Beach > (+1) Hard Ticket to Hawaii > Do or Die > (-1) Picasso Trigger > (-1) Guns > (-1) Malibu Express
Savage Beach > Hard Ticket to Hawaii > Do Or Die > (-1) Guns> (-1) Picasso Trigger > (-1) Malibu Express
035B Side Slop: Leviathan
Deep in the sea there is a monster hiding in the most unlikely place... Hiding under 10 million pounds of pressure... in a boat... with a safe... in a bottle... of triple distilled horror. Leviathan will haunt you until you only have 5 minutes of the movie left. This week Jon and Jason take a break from their normal routine to examine the Leviathan.
028B Side Slop: Critters II
If Tremors and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes got busy and a made a furry monster baby... and that little jerk is hungry. That baby would be named Critters 2: The Main Course
027B Side Slop: Hard Ticket to Hawaii
Jon and Chris are back to attack the animals-gone-mad action epic super spy spectacular that took 1987 by storm... that's right! A Hard Ticket to Hawaii has been bought and we're about to take that ride! Let's see how they've charted this short jaunt by light aircraft!
Chris Rankings: Savage Beach > Hard Ticket to Hawaii > (-1) Malibu Express
Jon Rankings: Savage Beach > Hard Ticket to Hawaii > (-1) Malibu Express
021 Lake Placid
After meeting a displaced Betty White in Hard Rain we wanted to summer with her at her lake house. We arrive and meet her for lemonade and cookies before Sheriff Hank comes and ruins our lovely picnic. O.F.F. is totally a jerk about Betty's unlicensed pets and it just turns into a whole thing. Let's join Betty as she fights the man in order to keep her happy family together.
Tony Todd does a great vanishing act in Shadowdbuilder but when he goes into the magic box with no mirrors where does he emerge? This week we find out that the answer is a tenement in Chicago.... lets check out Candyman!
Last time Michael Rooker was a cop in The Replacement Killers. Today he is a hired gun... for the Lord! That's right! We ARE watching the seminal breakthrough Bram Stoker classic Shadowbuilder. Old Rook has to stop an evil cabal of Catholic Satanists from plucking three hairs from the head of a stigmata-baby and chanting real loud at a couple of sticks summoning a sentient humanoid shadow-demon impersonating the space cowboy Spike from the spaceship Bebop to open the door to hell... ya follow?
014B Side Slop: Hush
Hush. It's not just a thing you say to babies anymore its also a home invasion horror movie that is inconsiderately telling a deaf woman to shut up with its title. In todays Side Slop special Guest Boots invades Jon's home movie watching habits to force Jon to use a Netflix. The results are messy and chaotic and theres a lot of messing with the clicker. Check it out.
014 The Killer
Last week Danny Lee was searching for something and he caused the death of nearly everyone in the world. This week Chow Yun-Fat causes the death of nearly everyone in the world which makes him search for something. There has to be something meaningful in that dichotomy. Join us as we discover the disappointing answer to that mystery in The Killer.
013 The Mighty Peking Man
Last week we watched in awe as Ni Tien conspired to build a log cabin out of corpses in what can only be described as a Corpse Mania. Naturally the corpse pile was just a framing device for the cousin of a guy. So naturally this week we follow that guy into the mountains where we heard there was a Kong.. no wait.. a Mighty Joe... no wait... a Mighty Peking Man... on the loose.. lets see what happens.
012b Side Slop: Suspiria
Jon said to Jason one too many times "thats a Giallo thing" so now were gonna do a Giallo! In this weeks Side Slop we check out Suspiria a movie where a dance maverick uses her dance skills to buzz the witchy-tower of the stuffy dean. Thats close enough. Find out what Suspiria is all about at the same time as Jason. Check it out.
012 Corpse Mania
Last week we enjoyed what in hindsight was a completely uncontroversial and fun blaxploitation/James bond style globe hopping adventure starring Ni Tien as the cute as a button but deadly serious martial arts skilled sidekick of cleopatra Jones. Let’s hope this week things are just as cheerful and carefree as they were in Ms. Tien’s heroine kingpin busting days. We join the necrophilic adventures in progress in Corpse Mania
011 Cleopatra Jones and the Casino of Gold
Last week Stella Stevens was bested in single combat by Mom... it wasn't a fair fight. Stella had no idea what about going down at the time and naturally being a lycan-granny is against the rules of most boxing commissions. But you can't keep a good woman down and so this week Stella Stevens is back and she's going to challenge some fool to a duel.... in the old school.... its pretty cool... stay tuned for Cleopatra Jones and the Casino of Gold
010B Side Slop: Savage Beach
On this weeks Side Slop... Do you like James Bond? Of course you do! Do you like "Skin Flicks"? Naturally! Do you also lack discernment? Absolutely, you listen to Cinema Slop! Join Jon and our intrepid guest Chris as they take a trip to Savage Beach. Don't let the name fool you its actually quite nice and not very threatening.
Claudia Christian handled herself commendably against the reanimated corpse of a rouge policeman last week so naturally we asked ourselves, "Self... how do you think Ms. Christian would fare against the most fabled beast of yore? (Dramatic Pause) The Lycanthrope! (Music cue)". Well if you, like some of us at Cinema Slop, have spent the last decade writing Cmdr. Susan Ivanova vs Hideous monster fan-fiction then you're in luck because we finally know the answer! This week... its The ultimate military officer vs. The Matron of Satan... Mom!
005b Side Slop: Pacific Rim Uprising
Welcome to our first tangent! This Episode is a stand alone fun time review of Pacific Rim Uprising with Special Guest Jason. Sit back and enjoy the no-notes post-theatrical viewing reaction of two guys in a hotel room. It's not that sexy but its still a fun time.
004 Men at Work
In todays episode we followed Keith David out of the wintery hell of Antarctica in The Thing(1982) into the comparatively pleasant life of a garbage man in Men at work.
Carl Taylor and James St. James have pellet based hijinks and eco-mayhem ensues in this weeks literal garbage movie Men at Work in which there is shockingly little work being done.
003 The Thing (1982)
After battling the forces of evil in San Fran Kurt Russell's Pork Chop Express has arrived at its final destination, the Arctic. It's a wintery hell-scape but old Kurt likes it just fine. Just don't mess with his shack, his scotch or his bodily autonomy. Let's sit back and watch...
002 Big Trouble in Little China
In todays episode we have followed the delightful Victor Wong from his previous home in Perfection Vally to San Francisco where he and his misfit-band of friends will have a mystical adventure that begins as all great stories do.... in an attorney's office.
Episode One: The Source
Jon and Jason Have arrived on the internet 15 years fashionably late. We're here to give a little love and a little salt to the world of pork products.. specifically to the Bacon product category.
Our podcast is simple. Using a Process called Backward Baconing, we start with His Eminence himself Mr Kevin Bacon in the 1990 Classic Tremors. After we have enjoyed this film completely we will choose our favorite character/actor from the film and select a film from their catalog.
There is no guarantee our choices will be wise, informed or even logical but it should be a good laugh. Join us on our choose your own adventure style journey into the unknown corners of cinematic pig pen from whence Bacon came.
Todays Episode Tremors
We join a small town already in progress as it discovers, "We've got worms".